30 Funny Answers to “What’s Up?”

Ever been asked the age-old question, “What’s up?” and felt the urge to respond with something other than the usual “Not much”? If you’re tired of the mundane replies and looking for a fresh, humorous twist, you’re in for a treat!

In this article, we’ll explore 30 witty and light-hearted responses to the casual greeting, each designed to bring a smile to your face and lighten the mood of any conversation.

List of Funny Answers to “What’s Up?”

• My heart rate.
• Nothing much – just staring at life.
• The sky.
• Everything taller than me.
• If you knew, would you bring it down?
• The galaxy.
• Planets.
• Sadly, the price of goods in the market.
• My house rent, sadly.
• Nothing. What’s down?
• I’m sorry, I can’t tell you.
• Are they staring at us?
• Definitely not your zipper.
• Not my salary.
• The opposite of down – it isn’t that hard.
• I haven’t got a clue. Care to tell?
• You’re welcome.
• Shocking stuff.
• Definitely not the devil.
• My to-do list is staring at me.
• The number of unread emails in my inbox.
• Trying to remember where I left my keys.
• The stock market, unfortunately.
• Just dodging adult responsibilities.
• Searching for motivation.
• My cat judging me from across the room.
• Resisting the urge to take a nap.
• Pretending to understand quantum physics.
• My optimism, but it’s on vacation.
• Wondering if aliens like pizza.

My Heart Rate

Nothing much – just staring at life.

Ever had a moment when life seems to be moving at an exhilarating pace, and your heart is doing the cha-cha without any apparent reason? The next time someone asks, “What’s up?” you might consider responding with a light-hearted quip about your heart rate.

Imagine a friend greets you with the familiar question, and you reply, “My heart rate. Nothing much – just staring at life.” This playful response not only adds a touch of humor but also invites the other person into a lighthearted conversation about the quirks of daily existence.

Example:

Friend: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Oh, you know, just my heart rate trying out for the next dance competition. Life’s the judge.”

The Sky

Everything taller than me.

Looking for an answer that’s both whimsical and relatable? Consider the classic “The sky” response. As a tongue-in-cheek observation, it suggests that everything towering above you is, indeed, what’s up. This humorous twist adds a touch of self-awareness, acknowledging the playful absurdity of the question itself.

Example:

Colleague: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Well, everything taller than me, which, let’s be honest, is pretty much everything. The struggle is real.”

If You Knew, Would You Bring It Down?

The galaxy. Planets.

Imagine someone posing the question, and you respond with a deadpan delivery, “If you knew, would you bring it down?” This whimsical response takes the inquiry to cosmic heights, introducing a playful element of surrealism. It’s a perfect way to infuse a dash of intergalactic humor into an otherwise ordinary exchange.

Example:

Neighbor: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Oh, you know, just the galaxy and some planets. If you figure out how to bring them down, let me know.”

Read Also: Best Replies to “Have You Reached Home?”

Sadly, the Price of Goods in the Market

My house rent, sadly.

Navigating the realities of adulting often involves grappling with financial responsibilities. When someone casually inquires about your well-being, inject a bit of financial humor into the conversation. Responding with “Sadly, the price of goods in the market. My house rent, sadly,” opens the door to commiseration and shared experiences, turning a routine question into a moment of camaraderie.

Example:

Friend: “What’s up?”

You: “Well, just battling the rising prices in the market and my ever-increasing house rent. Adulting at its finest, right?”

Nothing. What’s Down?

I’m sorry, I can’t tell you.

Flip the script on the conventional notion of “What’s up?” by playfully engaging with the concept of “down.” Responding with a mysterious twist such as “Nothing. What’s down? I’m sorry, I can’t tell you,” introduces an element of intrigue and sparks curiosity. It’s a surefire way to keep the conversation light and amusing.

Example:

Sibling: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Oh, nothing much. What’s down? But I’m afraid it’s classified information. Top-secret, you know.”

Are They Staring at Us?

Definitely not your zipper.

Inject a touch of playful paranoia into your response by implying that there might be something—or someone—out there watching. When asked, “What’s up?” a quirky reply like “Are they staring at us? Definitely not your zipper” turns a casual question into a comedic exchange. It’s a clever way to catch your conversational partner off guard.

Example:

Co-worker: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Just wondering if they’re staring at us. And no, I promise it’s not your zipper this time.”

Not My Salary

Not my salary.

For those moments when financial discussions are better left untouched, responding with “Not my salary” adds a humorous touch of deflection. It’s a light-hearted way to acknowledge the sensitivities around the topic while steering the conversation toward more enjoyable realms.

Example:

Acquaintance: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Oh, you know, not my salary. Let’s talk about something more uplifting, like cats in bowties.”

Read Also: Best Responses to “I Feel You”

The Opposite of Down – It Isn’t That Hard

The opposite of down – it isn’t that hard.

Offer a playful linguistic twist by engaging with the concept of opposites. When asked, “What’s up?” responding with “The opposite of down – it isn’t that hard” adds a layer of clever wordplay to the conversation. It’s a delightful way to showcase wit and keep the interaction intellectually light.

Example:

Friend: “What’s up?”

You: “Just contemplating the profound mysteries of opposites. Turns out, the opposite of down isn’t as hard to figure out as we thought.”

I Haven’t Got a Clue. Care to Tell?

I haven’t got a clue. Care to tell?

Transform the question into a playful guessing game by responding with a cheeky “I haven’t got a clue. Care to tell?” This approach invites the other person to contribute to the banter, creating a collaborative and engaging dynamic. It’s a fun way to keep the conversation interactive and entertaining.

Example:

Classmate: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Honestly, I haven’t got a clue. Care to enlighten me? Bonus points if it involves unicorns or time travel.”

You’re Welcome

You’re welcome.

Take a page from the deadpan humor playbook and respond to “What’s up?” with a straightforward and unexpected “You’re welcome.” This unexpected rejoinder adds an element of surprise, prompting a chuckle from the person who initiated the conversation. It’s a simple yet effective way to break the monotony of routine exchanges.

Example:

Roommate: “Hey, what’s up?” 

You: “You’re welcome. I figured you were about to thank me for making your day a little more interesting.”

Shocking Stuff

When words fail to capture the randomness of life, keep it light and vague with a response like “Shocking Stuff.” This catch-all phrase invites further exploration if the other person is curious, or it can serve as a quirky conversation endpoint, leaving room for interpretation.

Example: 

Sibling: “What’s up?” 

You: “Oh, you know, just dealing with Shocking Stuff. The usual chaos and randomness that life throws at us.”

Definitely Not the Devil

Definitely not the devil.

Inject a dose of humor into your response by playfully negating an extreme possibility. When asked, “What’s up?” a witty comeback like “Definitely not the devil” adds a touch of whimsy to the conversation. It playfully dismisses the notion of dealing with something sinister, turning a routine greeting into a moment of shared laughter. This response is ideal for lightening the mood and creating an atmosphere of camaraderie.

Example: 

Friend: “Hey, what’s up?” 

You: “Oh, you know, definitely not the devil. Just navigating the everyday challenges without any supernatural intervention.”

My To-Do List Is Staring at Me

My to-do list is staring at me.

Acknowledge the ever-present specter of pending tasks with a humorous twist. Responding to “What’s up?” with “My to-do list is staring at me” adds a touch of relatable comedy. It’s a lighthearted way to share the universal experience of grappling with responsibilities without delving too deeply into the specifics.

Example: 

Co-worker: “What’s up?” 

You: “Well, my to-do list is giving me the stink eye again. Looks like it’s time for another epic battle of productivity.”

The Number of Unread Emails in My Inbox

The number of unread emails in my inbox.

In the digital age, managing an overflowing inbox is a shared struggle. Turn the mundane into the amusing by responding to “What’s up?” with a quip like “The number of unread emails in my inbox.” It’s a relatable response that transforms the ordinary into the extraordinary, adding a dash of humor to the daily grind.

Example: 

Manager: “Hey, what’s up?” 

You: “Just contemplating the sheer magnitude of unread emails in my inbox. It’s like a digital Everest I need to conquer.”

Trying to Remember Where I Left My Keys

Trying to remember where I left my keys.

Lost keys are a universal source of frustration. Share a laugh by responding to the greeting with “Trying to remember where I left my keys.” This humorous reply not only humanizes the quest for misplaced items but also creates a moment of connection through shared forgetfulness.

Example:

Neighbor: “What’s up?”

You: “Oh, you know, just playing detective and trying to remember where I left my keys. If you see them, let me know.”

The Stock Market, Unfortunately

The stock market, unfortunately.

Embrace the absurdity of linking personal well-being to the whims of the stock market. When asked, “What’s up?” respond with a touch of financial satire, such as “The stock market, unfortunately.” This playful remark lightens the mood and adds a humorous spin to the ups and downs of daily life.

Example:

Relative: “Hey, what’s up?” You: “Well, my emotional rollercoaster is currently synchronized with the stock market. Unfortunately, it’s a bumpy ride.”

Just Dodging Adult Responsibilities

Just dodging adult responsibilities.

Life often throws adulting challenges our way, and sometimes the best response is a humorous acknowledgment. When queried about your day, consider replying with “Just dodging adult responsibilities.” This witty response captures the essence of navigating the complexities of grown-up life with a playful spin.

Example:

Friend: “What’s up?” You: “Not much, just perfecting my ninja moves while dodging adult responsibilities. It’s a skill, really.”

Searching for Motivation

Searching for motivation.

We’ve all been there—moments when motivation seems elusive. Responding to “What’s up?” with a candid “Searching for motivation” adds a touch of vulnerability and relatability to the conversation. It’s a simple yet authentic way to share the universal quest for inspiration.

Example:

Colleague: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Oh, just on a quest, searching for motivation. If you find any extra, feel free to share.”

My Cat Judging Me from Across the Room

My cat judging me from across the room.

Pet owners can attest to the watchful eyes of their furry companions. When asked, “What’s up?” inject a dose of pet humor with a response like “My cat judging me from across the room.” This amusing twist adds a touch of whimsy and showcases the entertaining dynamics of pet ownership.

Example:

Roommate: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Not much, just enduring the silent judgment of my cat. Apparently, my life choices are under scrutiny again.”

Resisting the Urge to Take a Nap

Resisting the urge to take a nap.

In the battle against the afternoon slump, humor becomes a valuable ally. Respond to the question with “Resisting the urge to take a nap” to infuse the conversation with a touch of self-awareness and a shared understanding of the universal struggle against midday drowsiness.

Example:

Sibling: “What’s up?”

You: “Just engaged in a fierce battle with the nap monster. So far, I’m winning, but it’s touch and go.”

Pretending to Understand Quantum Physics

Pretending to understand quantum physics.

For those moments when you find yourself in over your head with complex topics, embrace the humor of feigned expertise. When someone asks, “What’s up?” respond with a playful “Pretending to understand quantum physics.” This witty remark adds a layer of intellectual humor to the conversation.

Example:

Classmate: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Oh, just deep in thought, pretending to understand quantum physics. Spoiler alert: I’m in over my head.”

My Optimism, but It’s on Vacation

My optimism, but it’s on vacation.

We all have those days when optimism takes a backseat. Respond to the question with a touch of self-deprecating humor, such as “My optimism, but it’s on vacation.” This candid response adds a layer of authenticity while inviting the other person to share their own experiences with the ebb and flow of positivity.

Example:

Friend: “What’s up?”

You: “Well, not my optimism. It’s on vacation, probably sipping a tropical drink somewhere. I hope it sends a postcard.”

Wondering If Aliens Like Pizza

Wondering if aliens like pizza.

Elevate the conversation to extraterrestrial realms with a quirky response like “Wondering if aliens like pizza.” This imaginative twist injects a dose of humor into the discussion, inviting your conversational partner to join you in pondering the cosmic culinary preferences of potential intergalactic neighbors.

Example: 

Co-worker: “Hey, what’s up?”

You: “Just deep in contemplation, wondering if aliens out there have discovered the joy of pizza. It’s a crucial inquiry, you know.”

Conclusion

In the tapestry of everyday interactions, “What’s up?” serves as a familiar thread, weaving through the fabric of our social connections. By infusing humor into our responses, we transform routine exchanges into moments of shared laughter and connection.

So, the next time someone asks, “What’s up?” consider choosing a response from this eclectic list to bring a smile to their face and add a touch of whimsy to the conversation.

After all, a little humor can go a long way in brightening even the most ordinary moments of our lives.