40 Funny Things to Write on a Dry Erase Board

Dry erase boards aren’t just for jotting down reminders or work tasks; they’re a canvas for creativity and humor. Whether you’re looking to bring laughter to the office, classroom, or home, a witty message on a dry-erase board can do the trick.

In this article, we’ll explore 40 funny things to write on a dry-erase board that will not only entertain but also add a touch of humor to your daily life.

Table of Contents

List Of Funny Things to Write on a Dry Erase Board

  • Hold on! Before you erase me, what does it matter?
  • I’m not short and fat. Just horizontally inclined… but let’s not do calculations
  • Take out the log in your eyes first, you stinky!
  • You only rub me when you’re in the mood. I’ve got feelings too.
  • Are we really doing this today? Really?
  • Adulthood is a trap. I still can’t get down from this wall.
  • Rub me till I come clean
  • You look tired. Give up
  • There shall be no more postponement of classes… starting next week.
  • I don’t procrastinate. I won’t do it at all.
  • Hi, Jane. This is Dishes on the phone. I’m not in a rush but when do you plan to do me?
  • I used to be the most indecisive person I know… now, I’m not so sure about that
  • Do it!
  • I’d call the cops on you if I had rights in America- Board.
  • Do your thing, boss!
  • You think you can rub me and go scot-free? I’ve all day. Hehe
  • I think I’m clean enough but thanks.
  • Hold on! Don’t do this to me.
  • I’d ask you to listen to me if I weren’t just as foolish
  • Somebody help! He’s armed… and he’ll rub me
  • I’m not idle. I’m busy napping.
  • That writing thing tickles me.
  • Look away! I’m naked.
  • If you don’t mind, I’d like to be left alone today
  • Please, don’t think I’m a complete moron. I’m still missing some parts.
  • I’m not clumsy. Everything just gets in my way.
  • Why are you staring? Got a problem with me?
  • I’m not ignoring you. I’m on a socially distant mental holiday… from you
  • I put the ‘NIL’ in wisdom
  • I’m not new. Everyone’s old
  • Hold your horses! I may be slow, but I’m not stuck in reverse.
  • If brains were dynamite, I wouldn’t have enough to blow my nose.
  • I’m not lazy; I’m in energy-saving mode.
  • Don’t judge me; I was born awesome, not perfect.
  • Excuse me while I have a moment of non-brilliance.
  • I’m not a control freak; you’re just out of control.
  • If I were a superhero, my power would be procrastination.
  • I’m not a morning person or a night owl. I’m a permanently exhausted pigeon.
  • I’m not stubborn; my ideas just happen to be the best ones.
  • I’m not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.

1. Hold on! Before you erase me, what does it matter?

Ever felt like your notes on the board were being wiped away without mercy? This humorous plea captures the essence of a message trying to survive in the face of imminent erasure. It’s a playful reminder that even inanimate objects, like dry erase boards, can have a voice and a sense of self-preservation.

2. I’m not short and fat. Just horizontally inclined… but let’s not do calculations.

This cheeky phrase adds a humorous spin to body image by anthropomorphizing the dry erase board. It playfully deflects any attempts at measurement while injecting a dose of self-awareness, making it a light-hearted conversation starter.

3. Take out the log in your eyes first, you stinky!

In a clever play on the biblical saying about removing the log from one’s own eye before pointing out a speck in someone else’s, this message brings humor to the board. It’s a witty way to address issues, real or imaginary, with a touch of levity.

4. You only rub me when you’re in the mood. I’ve got feelings too.

Who would have thought that a dry erase board could have emotional needs? This humorous message personifies the board, making it a relatable character that demands attention and care. It adds a touch of humanity to the everyday object.

5. Are we really doing this today? Really?

Expressing exasperation or disbelief, this phrase captures the mood of those moments when you’re confronted with a task or situation that seems particularly challenging or absurd. It’s a humorous way to share your thoughts on the day’s agenda.

6. Adulthood is a trap. I still can’t get down from this wall.

Playing on the theme of adulthood as a trap, this message humorously imagines the dry erase board as a victim of growing up. The reference to being stuck on a wall adds a visual element that enhances the comedic effect.

7. Rub me till I come clean

This playful and slightly suggestive message adds a touch of humor to the act of erasing the board. It turns a mundane task into a cheeky invitation, making the process of cleaning the board more entertaining for everyone involved.

8. You look tired. Give up.

Addressing the exhaustion we all feel at times, this phrase provides a humorous perspective on perseverance. It’s a lighthearted way to acknowledge the challenges of the day while encouraging a moment of self-reflection.

9. There shall be no more postponement of classes… starting next week.

For educators or students, this message injects humor into the realm of class schedules and deadlines. It pokes fun at the idea of postponing classes indefinitely, creating a playful atmosphere for learning.

10. I don’t procrastinate. I won’t do it at all.

Procrastination is a universal struggle, and this phrase humorously embraces the idea of avoiding a task altogether rather than delaying it. It’s a relatable sentiment that many can laugh about while secretly acknowledging its truth.

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11. Hi, Jane. This is Dishes on the phone. I’m not in a rush but when do you plan to do me?

This witty message combines the mundane task of doing dishes with a phone call, creating a humorous scenario. It adds a playful touch to household chores, making them more engaging and amusing.

12. I used to be the most indecisive person I know… now, I’m not so sure about that.

Indecision can be frustrating, but this phrase turns it into a source of humor. It cleverly plays on the idea of being unsure about one’s own indecisiveness, creating a light-hearted perspective on decision-making.

13. Do it!

Sometimes, simplicity is key. This direct and commanding message on the dry erase board conveys a no-nonsense attitude. It’s a humorous way to cut through indecision or hesitation and get things done.

14. I’d call the cops on you if I had rights in America- Board.

Adding a touch of drama to the board’s message, this phrase humorously implies that the board would resort to legal action if it had the rights to do so. It’s a playful way to address perceived injustices.

15. Do your thing, boss!

This supportive and encouraging message is a humorous way to motivate someone. By referring to them as “boss,” it adds a touch of camaraderie and light-heartedness to the encouragement.

16. You think you can rub me and go scot-free? I’ve all day. Hehe

Turning the act of erasing into a playful challenge, this message gives the board a mischievous personality. It’s a humorous way to remind people that the board has all the time in the world.

17. I think I’m clean enough but thanks.

In a comical twist on cleanliness, this phrase suggests that the board might not be as pristine as one thinks. It’s a humorous way to playfully reject offers of cleaning or maintenance.

18. Hold on! Don’t do this to me.

Expressing vulnerability, this message gives the board a voice of protest against impending erasure. It adds a touch of drama to the act of cleaning the board, turning it into a humorous exchange.

19. I’d ask you to listen to me if I weren’t just as foolish.

Self-deprecating humor takes center stage in this phrase as the board admits to its own lack of intelligence. It’s a light-hearted way to acknowledge imperfections and share a laugh.

20. Somebody help! He’s armed… and he’ll rub me.

Adding an element of suspense and danger, this message turns the act of erasing into a potential threat. It’s a playful way to bring humor to a routine task and inject some excitement into the environment.

21. I’m not idle. I’m busy napping.

In a humorous twist on productivity, this message personifies the board as a hardworking entity that takes breaks for naps. It’s a playful way to address the balance between work and rest.

22. That writing thingy tickles me.

Infusing a sense of whimsy, this phrase imagines the act of writing on the board as a playful interaction. It adds a touch of joy to the process of using the board for communication or note-taking.

23. Look away! I’m naked.

Injecting a bit of humor into the concept of a blank board, this phrase playfully suggests that the board is in a vulnerable state when empty. It’s a creative way to approach the idea of a clean slate.

24. If you don’t mind, I’d like to be left alone today.

Providing the board with a sense of autonomy, this message humorously requests some personal space. It adds a touch of personality to the inanimate object, making it a fun and relatable presence.

25. Please, don’t think I’m a complete moron. I’m still missing some parts.

Embracing self-awareness and wit, this phrase acknowledges imperfections while playfully attributing them to missing parts. It’s a clever way to use humor to disarm potential critics.

26. I’m not clumsy. Everything just gets in my way.

This humorous message shifts blame away from the board, attributing clumsiness to external factors. It’s a playful way to address the occasional mishaps that might occur around the board.

27. Why are you staring? Got a problem with me?

Giving the board a voice of defiance, this phrase playfully challenges anyone who might be staring. It adds a touch of humor to the idea of an inanimate object confronting its observers.

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28. I’m not ignoring you. I’m on a socially distant mental holiday… from you.

This phrase takes a humorous approach to the concept of social distancing, applying it to a mental vacation. It’s a playful way to address the need for personal space in a lighthearted manner.

29. I put the ‘NIL’ in wisdom.

Playing with words, this phrase humorously suggests a lack of wisdom by inserting “NIL” into the word. It’s a clever and light-hearted way to address the complexities of knowledge and intelligence.

30. I’m not new. Everyone’s old.

Inverting the typical notion of newness, this phrase humorously asserts that the board is not the newcomer; rather, everyone else is considered old. It’s a playful way to challenge perceptions.

31. Hold your horses! I may be slow, but I’m not stuck in reverse.

This phrase adds a humorous spin to the idea of being slow or cautious. It playfully asserts that being deliberate doesn’t mean being stuck, injecting a dose of wit into the concept.

32. If brains were dynamite, I wouldn’t have enough to blow my nose.

A classic self-deprecating quip, this phrase uses humor to downplay intelligence. It’s a playful way to acknowledge shortcomings while eliciting laughter from those who come across it.

33. I’m not lazy; I’m in energy-saving mode.

This humorous message reframes laziness as an energy-saving feature. It’s a clever and playful way to justify taking it easy while adding a touch of whimsy to the idea of conserving energy.

34. Don’t judge me; I was born awesome, not perfect.

This phrase embraces imperfection while asserting inherent awesomeness. It’s a humorous way to promote self-acceptance and remind others not to be too quick to judge.

35. Excuse me while I have a moment of non-brilliance.

Injecting a touch of humility and humor, this phrase playfully acknowledges that brilliance isn’t constant. It’s a lighthearted way to handle moments of less-than-stellar thinking.

36. I’m not a control freak; you’re just out of control.

This phrase humorously shifts the blame, suggesting that the board isn’t the one with control issues. It’s a playful way to address the dynamics of control in a humorous manner.

37. If I were a superhero, my power would be procrastination.

Turning procrastination into a superpower, this phrase adds a humorous twist to the common struggle. It’s a playful way to reframe a negative habit into something amusing and relatable.

38. I’m not a morning person or a night owl. I’m a permanently exhausted pigeon.

This humorous message captures the essence of perpetual tiredness by likening it to a constantly fatigued pigeon. It’s a playful way to express the challenges of managing energy levels.

39. I’m not stubborn; my ideas just happen to be the best ones.

Injecting humor into stubbornness, this phrase playfully defends the quality of one’s ideas while acknowledging a certain level of inflexibility. It’s a witty way to approach differing perspectives.

40. I’m not a complete idiot; some parts are missing.

This classic self-deprecating phrase adds a touch of humor to the idea of being less than perfect. It’s a playful way to disarm criticism and elicit a laugh from those who come across it.

Conclusion

Dry erase boards serve as more than just functional tools; they’re canvases for creativity and humor. The 40 funny things to write on a dry erase board explored in this article offer a mix of wit, sarcasm, and playful banter. Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood in the office, classroom, or at home, these messages can bring smiles and laughter to those who encounter them. So, the next time you pick up a marker, consider infusing a bit of humor into your messages on that blank white canvas. After all, a good laugh is always welcome, even in the most unexpected places.

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